Alas Smith and Jones
A British comedy sketch television series featuring Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones that ran on BBC One and BBC Two from 31 January 1984 to 14 October 1998. From series 5 in 1989 the 'Alas' title was dropped and became simply Smith and Jones.
Seasons
1. Bronstein, Police Chiropodist
Air Date: 1984-01-31
The first of six programmes starring Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones with Annabel Leventon, Annette Lynton, Shane Rimmer. Andrew Francis, Raymond Mason and a special guest appearance by Nicholas Ball. A hard-hitting exposé of sperm banks, Samurai accountants and chiropody, all done with impeccable taste and integrity.
2. Desert
Air Date: 1984-02-07
With Ken Morley, Hugh Thomas and Geoff Capes. The 'right to know' team look into orange juice cartons and discover divorce, pornography, bran and two donkeys.
3. Raz Soap Powder
Air Date: 1984-02-14
Guest stars Tony Robinson and Brenda Blethyn. This is your only chance to discover what the Pope really gets up to at home, how the French Resistance resisted and the secret of Roger Moore's success.
4. Dr. Jekyll
Air Date: 1984-02-21
Witness Margaret Thatcher 's finest hour, sample the exciting qualities of real ale and spend a day with the Great Gobbo in this week's tasteful programme.
5. George Smiley, British Spy
Air Date: 1984-02-28
Join the police on a night siege and probe the soft underbelly of the pop world. Yes, it's another exciting episode in the Smith and Jones 'Guide to Life'. This week: how to become a barbed-wire consultant and solve the enigma of correlation.
6. SDP
Air Date: 1984-03-06
The last of six programmes starring Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones, with Andrew Francis, Tony Robinson, Brenda Blethyn, Annabel Leventon, Annette Lynton and Hugh Burden. Alas the last Alas... but beware these scholars of history, literature and contemporary comment may well return to enlighten you. Tonight's dissertation is on the Spanish Civil War. Ole.
1. An American Armchair In London
Air Date: 1985-10-31
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones begin their side-splitting six week series with a show that has everything: comedy, music and a nasty skin complaint.
2. Inflatable Cactus
Air Date: 1985-11-07
With Chris Barrie and Robin Driscoll. The critics have hailed this series as, "The most expensive comedy programme since Tender is the Night. Miss the Nine 0 'Clock News to catch it."
3. George Best: An Apology
Air Date: 1985-11-14
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones bring you the third programme of this 425 part epic science series. This week they ask the question which has baffled millions: "How does James Burke get away with it ?"
4. West Side Story
Air Date: 1985-11-21
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones host this special charity edition in aid of those unfortunate millions who have been on the Terry Wogan show. With Stephen Fry, Gwen Taylor and Robin Driscoll.
5. Jailbreak
Air Date: 1985-11-28
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones bring you the hit entry of this year's Leningrad Television Festival where it won the coveted 'Zinc Daisy of Stalin Award' for the most agriculturally informative comedy show of the year. With Stephen Fry and Robin Driscoll.
6. Lucky George
Air Date: 1985-12-05
Conclusion of the series. Not to put too fine a point on it the show starts on a rubbish tip and ends with a fart.
1. Gas Readers
Air Date: 1986-09-18
A bad year on the horses and a worse one on the property market means that BBC2 is proud and extremely lucky to present The New Series.
2. Try Not to Look Like a Badger
Air Date: 1986-09-25
Starring Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones with Alexandra Dane, Peter Dawson, Robin Driscoll, Nigel Harman, Peter McCarthy , Gareth Milne and Sylvestra Ie Touzel.
3. Scuba Diver
Air Date: 1986-10-02
With special appearances by Mick Channon, Gary Glitter, Leslie Grantham, Jools Holland, Hazel O'Connor and Janet Street-Porter.
4. Football Supporters on a Plane
Air Date: 1986-10-09
More fun and frolics as the whacky duo think it a super wheeze to rehash an old Terry and June script.
5. Getting Ready for the Show
Air Date: 1986-10-16
Two men, two minds, two visions... one porpoise.
6. Mel Gives Birth
Air Date: 1986-10-23
Last Smith and Jones for a while. Featuring the definitive opus of Peter Leander Brewis, 'Concerto for string quartet and next-door neighbour', recorded earlier in the year at the Oddfellows Hall, Peckham.
1. Violence on TV
Air Date: 1987-10-15
They're back to back, head to head and side by side, but fortunately not on top of each other.
2. Impersonations
Air Date: 1987-10-22
The Show They Tried to Ban! ... is not on tonight. They succeeded. So there's this instead. With Tracie Bennett and John Humphrys.
3. Sunday Film: The Sword of St. Petersburg
Air Date: 1987-10-29
Starring Pete Duel and Ben Murphy. Special guest appearances by Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones.
4. Start the Show off with a Bang
Air Date: 1987-11-05
Nobody could ever accuse Alas Smith and Jones of poor taste. It costs a fortune.
5. Trev
Air Date: 1987-11-12
Guest starring Roger Lloyd Pack and Linda Lusardi.
6. Night Network
Air Date: 1987-11-19
Probably the most refreshing and part-reaching comedy show in the world with Kim Clifford.
7. Police Surveillance Unit
Air Date: 1987-11-26
Last chance to get your complaints in before the series finishes. With Janice Cramer Robin Driscoll Nigel Harman, Peter McCarthy and Garfield Morgan.
1. The New Version
Air Date: 1989-11-16
Starring Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones with Chris Langham and Heather Tobias.
2. The Untreated Version
Air Date: 1989-11-23
With Chris Langham, Josie Lawrence and Kate Williams.
3. The Uncut Version
Air Date: 1989-11-30
Mount Olympus - luxurious home of Greece's first family - the Gods. Follow their triumphs and disappointments in the classic soap opera Olympus.
4. The Untouchable Version
Air Date: 1989-12-14
In Olympus II, Sara Crowe as Aphrodite and Miranda Richardson as Hera.
5. The Undiscovered Version
Air Date: 1989-12-21
With Chris Langham, Rosemary Martin and Heather Tobias.
6. The Unprepared Version
Air Date: 1989-12-28
Starring Jane Horrocks, Chris Langham, Rosemary Martin, Andy Taylor, Heather Tobias, Kate Williams. With the final episode of that classic soap Olympus.
1. A Womb with a View
Air Date: 1990-11-22
The boys are back. Head to head, back to front and upside down. For new viewers, Smith is the slightly larger one and Jones is slightly Welsh.
2. Women's Shower Room
Air Date: 1990-11-29
A second bumper package of humorous skits featuring loveable, chubby Mel Smith and cheeky chappie Griff Rhys Jones.
3. Rock Star's House
Air Date: 1990-12-06
A third foray into the funny, farcical and felicitous world of the comical duo whose names begin with the letters 'j' and 's'.
4. Dumping Rubbish in the Berkshire Countryside
Air Date: 1990-12-13
Discover how the pyramids were built. Accompany Sir John Harvey-Jones on his latest troubleshoot. And discover why the drivers of F-registration Montegos should beware the next budget.
5. Interrupting Des Lynam
Air Date: 1990-12-20
Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat, so hang the decorations and the fairy lights and join Smith and Jones on a trip to funnyland.
6. Hello Wembley
Air Date: 1990-12-26
Tonight's show guarantees no references to Christmas, hangovers, boxing, sleighbells, or the works of Charles Dickens.
7. Comics Relief
Air Date: 1991-01-03
Last in the series starring Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones. A preview of a new movie about the Welsh mafia, and clairvoyant Doris Cockney.
1. Water Slide
Air Date: 1992-10-22
Return of the British Comedy Award-winning series starring Mel Smith Griff Rhys Jones. Among the subjects promised in this new series are endangered species, courtship in the 50s, dustcart trophies, traffic wardens, political speeches, the postal system and street vendors - and of course a weekly 'head to head'.
2. Traffic Warden
Air Date: 1992-10-29
More subjects are given an unexpected twist - plus musical set-pieces.
3. Runaway Bus
Air Date: 1992-11-05
More comedy sketches, musical set-pieces, and a 'head to head' problem that needs to be discussed.
4. Your Parents Going to be Staying Long ?
Air Date: 1992-11-19
Another fast-moving sequence of sketches, songs and 'head-to-head' problems.
5. Griff Can't Find His Car
Air Date: 1992-11-26
The award-winning duo. More fun and frolics from the slightly larger one who comes from London and the slightly thinner one who comes from Wales.
6. I Don't Care
Air Date: 1992-12-03
Last in the comedy series starring Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones. A collection of comic items as the double award-winning duo add to the gaiety of nations.
1. Bad Microphones
Air Date: 1995-09-06
The long-time collaboration between Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones continues as they return with a six part comedy series full of observational humour, man-to-man duologues and hard-hitting lunacy.
2. Prescription Drugs
Air Date: 1995-09-13
With Jonathan Kydd and Steffanie Pitt.
3. Missing Link
Air Date: 1995-09-20
Maggie Philbin joins Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones in their new comedy series to launch Thick Aid - a charity helping the stupid to help themselves. Plus, other comic sketches including the problem of ordering food in a Japanese restaurant, and Mel worrying that he is getting too old to, "pull the birds."
4. Griff has Stage Fright
Air Date: 1995-09-27
More fast-moving comedy and sharp-edged sketches from Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones. Including sketches about a visit to a brothel which specialises in correction, a cabinet minister who has trouble with his equipment, and the duo consider adopting children from foreign countries. Tonight's special guest is Lynda Baron.
5. Tails
Air Date: 1995-10-04
In a programme originally scheduled for 13 September, Dinsdale Landen plays an unintelligible country squire when he joins Mel and Griff. The duo discuss the joys of body piercing and present sketches including a comic look at the law of probability.
6. Rough Direction
Air Date: 1995-10-18
Last in the series of fast-moving comedy and sharp-edged sketches, from Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones. With guests Stratford Johns and Geraldine James.
1. Cookery
Air Date: 1997-06-19
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones return with six new programmes of comic sketches, characters and the traditional head-to-head chats.
2. Morgue
Air Date: 1997-06-26
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones star in the second of six programmes of new comic sketches, characters and the traditional head-to-head dialogues.
3. Massage
Air Date: 1997-07-03
Tonight, Mel thinks he has a resemblance to Tom Cruise, and Mr Green and Mr Brown try to pick up some free wine at the bottle bank.
4. Hookers
Air Date: 1997-07-10
Tonight's show features a spoof of the James Bond films, the return of the cabaret duo, and Jimbo and Timbo the incompetent builders trying to eat a Chinese takeaway.
5. Spilled Drink
Air Date: 1997-07-17
This week's programme features a modern slant on the ten commandments, the advent of widescreen TV, and the special effects men at a fertility clinic.
6. Catflap
Air Date: 1997-07-24
The last in the current series of comic sketches, characters and head-to-head confrontations with Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones. The programme features the sound effects men in charge of Hitler's Nuremberg Rally PA system, a look at life in an inflation-hit South American republic and the resident cabaret musos dispensing more words of wisdom.
1. Alarm Clock
Air Date: 1998-09-09
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones return for another series of comic sketches, including more head-to-head discussions.
2. Flight Simulator
Air Date: 1998-09-16
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones continue their series of comic sketches. There's a spoof of Alfred Hitchcock 's classic film Rear Window and new dance sensation Conga Britannica.
3. Tanker
Air Date: 1998-09-23
Mel and Griff try to find out if their friend Frank, played by Alun Armstrong, is wearing a toupee.
4. Tie Man of the Year
Air Date: 1998-09-30
This week Griff tries to combat Mel's snoring and the duo unearth a long-lost satire programme of the sixties.
5. New TV
Air Date: 1998-10-07
The duo play soldiers with a timekeeping problem, Mel goes to an all-night celebrity party, and there's a head-to-head on the problems of managing an all girl band.
6. Griff's Accident
Air Date: 1998-10-14
Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones conclude their series of comic sketches with the duo revealing an amazing breakthrough in personal technology. With guest, rock guitarist Brian May.
Select an episode to start watching
Rating
7.2/10
Release Date
1984-01-31
Episodes
62 (10 seasons)
Status
Ended
